Cheemo Charlie update courtesy of brown road
I have just received a text of bro and it reads as follows…Hi bro “how do I sink an unsinkable turd“?
Now I know that bro with his cheemo has been constipated for a few weeks now and analyzing the words of his text I can assume the following.
1..Bro has done a cheemo turd and the fact that it is unsinkable means that it is a rather large cheemo turd possibly an enormous cheemo turd.
2. Bro has already tried flushing the cheemo turd without success although he may have not tried flushing but merely turned around and saw the mammoth sized cheemo turd and just assumed it was unsinkable, however that would be a rash judgement so I will assume he has tried to sink the cheemo turd.
3.Assuming this then I imagine there are no plumbing issues in trying to sink the large cheemo turd.
4.I assume bro is trying to get advice off me for an alternative method of disposal of the cheemo turd , such as washing it down the sink, or putting it in the bin, or throwing it out of the window. I am not sure from the text if bro is still in the bathroom or if he has left the bathroom to google it for an answer to the problem or if he is in a panic as the toilet fills with water…
5.I cannot guarantee with 100% certainty but I imagine that bro is not actually at home at this moment but he has dropped an enormous cheemo turd in someone else’s house and he is acutely embarrassed.
6. I can however assume that bro has not dropped this enormous cheemo turd in a public toilets where it is common practice to just leave enormous turds with complete disregard for the next person to use the toilet.
With all these facts taken into consideration I have come to the following conclusion…
Bro is in the house of an attractive lady that he has met on a Rochdale Obese dating website and after a successful afternoon of dining on steaks and seafood and a couple of bottles of expensive wine and two fabulous deserts and finish with two large cognacs, at a local hostelry, coupled with a little footsie and hand holding as they walk back to her house. Upon arriving at her house she has romantically asked bro in for a coffee. While sitting on the couch I deduce that bro has had one of his chemo stomach cramps and excused himself and goes to use the bathroom. When there he begins to part with the most enormous cheemo turd imaginable. He then flushes the toilet but then looks back and sees the unsinkable chemo turd floating and lodged in the bowl. Panic then has set in due to the fact that his chances of getting laid this afternoon are going down the pan! (unlike the cheemo turd). As ever, when he is in the shit (so to speak) its me he texts. Why he cant ring mum or one of our sisters or even someone from warbys for advice I don’t know. Anyway that’s all I can deduce from the short text he has sent…..I would like to let you know what has happened next but I am not replying to his text till tomorrow…I will leave it open to you all to speculate the outcome in your comments…….im logging off
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