MY LITTLE BROTHER HAS CANCER

Chemo Charlie update.

Well it was interesting at Christies yesterday. I don’t know if anyone knows but during bros last chemotherapy session he shared the adjoining room with Brian Kidd the ex Manchester United player, who is now assistant coach of Manchester City. Brian Kidd was in for treatment of cancer of the earholes.  Apparently ( I have been told by the nurses) him and Fat Bro talked through the entire session about football, not that bro knows a lot about the game, and it would appear that when the nurses were talking to bro about the side effects of mouth ulcers he was having and bro said i managed to brush em and am glad my munching back, because of the earhole tumours Brian had mistaken this as, I have managed Borrusia Monchangladbach. Not only that, he has heard of a job going in Manchester which fat bro might be ideal for.. Someone called the GLAZERS came to see him today. They managed to arrange a WINDOW in between his chemotherapy drips, It was a bit of a PANE with all the tubes around. They said there were 3 in the FRAME for the job, however they shortlisted to 2 because THEY COULD SEE RIGHT THROUGH ONE OF THEM. They wanted to keep the media at BAY so they could privately appoint someone for the OPENING. Anyway I tried to tell them that fat bro knew nothing about football but the fact that bro told them he had 4 children named Alex, Bobby, George and Matt fooled them a bit. They went on to ask Bro if he were successful in the application what would be his goals at Old Trafford, Bro replied that he thought he might make use of the ones they had at the moment and maybe buy 2 new nets for them…Thick fooker!! They asked if he felt comfortable spending 200 million pound on the market. Bro said he would buy 50,000 chicken legs, 40,000 meat pies, 16,000 donuts and of course 35,000 diet cokes, I stopped him and said on the transfer market, not Bury Market   numpty!!! Well Bro said he would buy Lionel Eton Messi, Bring back, Brian Éclair, Patrick Burger, and Paul Wanchop, providing Terry Butcher would sell him. Of course  keeping Robin Flan Persie. Robbie Cabbage and Dwight Yorkie might make the reserve team. Any monies left and he might slip Mike Battenberg a bit for his help!!

What about Giggs at Old Trafford they asked..  Oh said Bro I would have a One Direction concert in June and an Adele concert in July…THICK Fooker!!

Anyway they have seemed to pull down the banner at Old Trafford saying The CHOSEN ONE,  and they  asked bro what he would like in its place…Bro thought and said because I have an addiction to Ham Shanks from Iceland I would like it replaced by the FROZEN ONE he replied, going on to add that he would like to emulate that famous manager Bill Ham Shankly

Anyway to cut a long story short, the fat fooker, has only landed the job, obviously in his condition it is only a short term contract, (a month or two longer than Moyes) 3 hours a week, which is around about what the lazy git has been putting at Warburtons

He misses the next 4 matches because of a rib injury he picked up when the fat fooker got stuck in the turnstiles at the ground…so hes put Giggsy in charge….but Bro selected the team for weekend…..In Goal …         Bruce Gobbleall

A back four of..A Buttyner.  Norman Bunter John Terry(chocolate orange) Paul Scones

Midfield of …Nani (bread   Brian HobsOn..   Paul Mince and Sergio Biscuits

And two up front of course…Robin Flan Persie and Gianfranco Cola.(diet of course)

The Theatre Of Creams……………FAT FOOKER!!!!