Cheemo Charlie update..........the final one.... i
hope......
What a pantomime it is going to be today. Here am I stuck in
this thing, not enough room to swing a cat round in. This would been my tight sister
Babs choice I bet. Wonder where she got it from www.cheap coffin.com i
imagine. I have seen bigger boxes on the cereal aisle at Tescos!! All week
people have been popping there heads in gawping at me. Mums been there pecking
my head for days. Be glad when they shut
the lid. And all the rubbish they have
been chucking in. Thanks Charles for the wacky bakky spliff you put in, dint
have the sense to put a lighter or matches in with it ......numpty!!, it is not
even a cremation so i cannot even get a light there!! Happy days
Whose idea was it to put two bowls in, ones just rolled when
the hearse set off and clonked me on the head, i cannot tell you what the other one has hit, but it is
the first time i have had tears in my eyes since I had to buy the first round
after winning the Waterloo. If i find it was William who put them in he is in
for it. I think for sure bro must have sorted out the pall bearers. Good choice
bro, two 4 foot tall, two 5 feet tall, and
two 6 feet 6 inches tall, the coffins being carried at an angle of 45
degrees, all the bloods rushed to me head, me bodies all white and my heads
bright red... i look like a toffee apple!! Happy days..
Big crowd though, i know i said dress as you want, but you
there in the fourth row, yes you!! Your half undressed woman.. if this coffin
lid starts to slowly open because of you i can see a massive stampede to the
door!!
Have you seen the plot they have picked for me, Blinking
Rebecca I bet, farm on one side, Springfield Park golf course on the other, so
it is the smell of cow dung daily for me while i get peppered by golf balls
from 24 handicap golfers all through the year. A 98 year old church warden on
one side and an 88 year old mother of seven on the other...Happy days...not!!!!
Well look at all you bowlers......Stand up everyone who I have
not beat!.....thought so, not a rear has left a pew, you are all thinking that
is one less we have to beat when we go Hopwood...well just remember when you
are all at 20-20 and your running up the last wood, think is rolling straight
to the jack and a sudden gust of wind sends it a yard past i will be laughing
my head off up there!
Nice to see you all
in your club sweaters, hee hee...you fell for that one, you all look right
wallies!!!...
Songs were nice....I wanted Bohemian Rhapsody, but our Sue
was worried that someone might forget to turn the cd off and I would be lowered
in to the grave and the solemn silence would be broken by the sound of “Du Du
Du Du Another one bites the dust”. Happy days..
Dressed me in my Man
City shirt though...Thanks Kids...i know that so and so of a bro of mine wanted
me in a Man United one...but i wouldn’t be seen dead in one of
them....woops...no pun intended.... Dont laugh!!! Your at a funeral, I will excuse you if you let out a giggle in
a few minutes though because I am dying to break wind.
So here we
are...happy days.....i have had a fantastic life.....i have laughed and
cried...i have moments to treasure, memories of a lifetime of love. So many
beautiful people that i have shared it with...got to go now...got a date with
an 88 year old mother of seven....Stud muffin.lol Happy
days..........................xxx
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